There are several centers near us & tomorrow I am going to call them all. One HAS to have the NxStage. It was your posts & pictures that sold me. I cannot handle the Cobe, I just know it & here is way.
Several centers nearby, hmm, that sounds promising. I hope one of them will be able to offer what you want.
My husband, the patient, absolutely will not get involved in learning anything about dialysis other than say he wants home dialysis. I have asked him many, many times to read the threads & posts on HDS & all he says is…later & later has never come, never will. I spend hours every day here & probably even pester posters with dumb questions, but this is the only place there is to go, I would be helpless without it. When you call the center you don’t get very much info they are very nice, but what you do get is often not very much help.
For instance I had no idea we could make choices, never told that.
[b]Currently, that’s the way it is. Most clinics will not educate patients about these options. Its us the patients that have to seek these options. I myslef had to leave the last clinic as they didn’t offer NxStage nor wouldn’t get it.
However, you keep trying till you have accomplished what you want for him. You sure care alot, but somehow he will need to care for himself as well. You can’t drag yourself like that but at least give him the resources and let him decide.[/b]
He will even hold up some food & ask me if he can “have this” so will not even read the Dialysis Diet booklet he was given. His blood test read he was low on protein other than that it was good, but he has had only one test.
I asked him to bring home a copy, still waiting. I trust myself more than anyone to keep a watch on things.
Does he cook for himself or do you cook for him? Are both of you prepared to know what foods to use?
I have tried to explain that he has to learn & understand what he needs to know & do to be able to do HD & make some decisions for himself, take some control. He’s new at this, two months, and so am I, but I am not the one who is sick & I simply cannot understand anyone who would not like to learn all he can about his disease. I’ve learned so much since finding HDC & I can’t stay away because there’s a lot I don’t know & it’s not all that easy to understand. I’ll keep reading, learning. & trying & if & when he ever gets on HD I’m sure a lot of what I am reading will start to come together & make sense.
Well, it won’t be a good idea to drag yourself and make the decisions for him but if its always been like that for both of you its gonna be hard to reverse that, so in this case you as a caretaker for him that means some team work is needed. Starting… its hard and will take time to adjust the new living style. You as a trainer and motivator will guide him and steer him onto the right track.
I want him to understand that HD is NOT like in hospital or in center where you just lay back & are completely taken care of. I want him know that I am not going to do this for him, but I’ll always be there to help.
Today at noon I asked him to start doing some reading at HDC & he said he would soon as he got dressed & I did’t see again him until 6:00 & then I got the same old “I’ll do it tomorrow” Well, that ain’t gonna to happen because “tomorrow” he goes to the center.
Give it sometime, maybe he’d rather be in-center…the day will come when he will say from his own mouth that he wants home dialysis and he will do that himself. You just be his guide and assist him but once again don’t drag yourself like that. Just give him the resources just as what your doing now and just let him decide.
Well, anyway Gus, after boring you & crying on your shoulder with all my frustrations just to tell you that I could not deal with Cobe maybe you will understand why, it’s just too much machine for me to handle.
I want the best for my husband & the easiest for me because I’m afraid that’s how it’s probably going to end up.
Hey, don’t worry about it, just relax. You’ve done your part on helping him and you still are. All of us here on this board are here to help both of you decide.
Thanks so much for your help Gus, really greatly appreciated.
Sure Dori, your welcomed!
thanks for those links there are eight centers all within 10 to 15 miles from us & one of them just has to have the NxStage, I hope. If not there is one that has it, downtown Philadelphia 25 miles, not far, but I hate the thought of having to go into the city.
Hey, 25 miles is not far… …its okay to go to the city, just for a while…